The End of NIAW...

Like anything else that is chronic, it doesn't go away at the end of an "awareness" campaign for those of us living it. Our lives continue to be touched, and will continue to be touched forever. The scars that IF leaves on an individual and couple don't ever go away no matter how their IF is resolved. And sometimes they are even re-opened from time to time.

We get told that our insurance won't cover a certain test or procedure because it's Infertility related (for another post!)...but we have to pay into the same pool that covers a co-worker's Maternity Care and Well Baby visits to the doctor.

We have paid hundreds of dollars in property taxes for education (not to mention they are just going down the drain in our city), just because we own a home, but we have no children.

We will have to pay out hundreds of dollars for medication over our lifetime related to a very real medical condition that has impacted our IF, but yet insurance will cover Viagra.

We turn on the news only to hear of someone who just threw their baby in a dumpster like a piece of trash. While it makes us sick to think how someone could do that.

It hurts. The wound is reopened.

But I am so thankful that God has promised that "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up (our) wounds" (Psalm 147:3).

I am thankful that my desire to be a mother to children in my home, whether ever realized or not, is not the end of the road. It is only a microscopic speck in the span of eternity...

For that I am so thankful.

Don't Ignore...Male Factor Infertility

Don’t ignore the man who hurts because his wife is hurting. She has just taken a pregnancy test for more times than he can count and it is negative. Again.

Don’t ignore the man who doesn’t have children when you are talking about yours. He would do anything to give his wife a houseful of them to fulfill her lifelong dream.

Don’t ignore the man who wishes he could take his wife’s pain away. This is the one thing he can’t fix. This is the one thing he feels that he is a failure at. He can succeed on the job and earn praise from management, but he can’t do anything in his power to succeed at growing his family.

Don’t ignore the man who begins to fear that he may be the cause of their now labeled Infertility, as months begin turning into years. He now must undergo embarrassing and unpleasant testing.

Don’t ignore the man who finds out the crushing news that he will never, ever, be able to father a child with his genetic makeup. He will never see his reflection in a precious baby’s face that he created with his wife.

Don’t ignore the man who doesn’t feel like being social because he is doing all he can to make it through another day of living after his world has crumbled down around him. Reach out to him. Leave him a voicemail if he doesn’t answer or send an email. Pray for him. Invite him to go out. He needs encouragement.

Don’t ignore the man who allows himself to be vulnerable in order to tell you he and his wife will never be able to have children. Realize that he has thought about adoption. Don’t dismiss or invalidate his grief by offering up options.
Just say “I’m sorry”.

Don’t ignore the fact that there is something called Male Factor Infertility (MFI). It is a very real cause of a man’s partner not being able to conceive but not many people, unless touched by Infertility themselves, realize or talk about it. It is a real cause of grief for both a man and a woman. It can cause a man to question his true manhood. There are many medical causes of Male Factor Infertility, which together, account for about 35% of all the cases of IF. Some of these causes the man is born with and can never, ever, be reversed. Some are due to imbalances of hormones or abnormalities of sperm, and the couple may have a chance at treating it in hopes of a pregnancy. Whatever the cause of the MFI, many, many times the issue remains undetected until a man tries to have children, unsuccessfully.

So…please don’t ignore the men that are hurting too and the fact that
Male Factor Infertility is a real medical condition.

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For more information on the disease of Infertility visit:

http://www.resolve.org/infertility101

For more information about National Infertility Awareness Week & it's theme "Don't Ignore..." visit:

http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html