Leadership

Leadership is something that has been on my heart for the last week or so.

A couple weeks ago I sat in a group of women at a Prayer & Dessert Fellowship at church as the only non-mom. The majority were around my age and had anywhere from 1-4 children. Then we had a few older moms who had already been at the stage my peers were going through.

As the women talked, I fought back tears. I couldn't have been more self-conscious or felt that I stood out more. When it came time to go around the circle and introduce ourselves I felt such dread. They are all in the threshold of child rearing full-time and I am in my new phase of life, back to working in an office full-time with no plans on the table for growing our family right now- "just living life" as I always say to people while I feel my heart get pricked.

So I shared about my current phase of life and how long my husband and I have been married (because I feel like that is an accomplishment!), and felt like a total odd-ball. Prayer request time was much the same. But I thought it was time to throw in, as if it wasn't obvious by that point in the evening (although the talk was so entrenched in motherhood and child rearing that they may not have even noticed?), that dh and I are Infertile. I hate that word. When it rolls off my tongue it feels foreign although it is the life we now know. The word that crushed our dreams. But I shared how I am currently on a "joy journey" and seeking God's will for my life as an individual, as dh is as well. And some things I am getting involved with in church, when one of the older women there prompted me to share.

What I didn't tell you yet is that I organized this evening and the ones that will follow once a month this summer. And to be honest, I am still not sure I am going to attend the next one. I am currently praying about that and working through how I feel. But I couldn't have been more encouraged when I shared this experience with my friend and women's ministry leader over lunch a few days later, and she told me with certainty that, "That is God preparing you for leadership." Wait. What?!  It seemed odd at first, but then it makes more sense as I talk to dh about it and read articles on leadership in the Church and throughout the bible. It's scary, but yet refreshing to think that God often times takes those individuals who are "different" than the rest, to refine them and set them apart in order to rise to a position of leadership.

Throughout the evening and as I left, I felt God's presence with me. In spite of my pain, I felt blessed that as a result of God laying such an event on my heart to organize, He was moving. Not exactly how I had planned, but how He did. I know that many of the women (a.k.a. moms) were blessed by this evening out and receiving encouragement from others through the openness and sharing that took place. I am thankful for that. I just am not sure that these gatherings are going to be a "healthy" place for me personally.

I am still figuring this concept of "leadership" out and most certainly will be, one step at a time for the rest of my life, but I just wanted to share a different perspective that maybe one of you haven't considered in your journey through struggles and pain. Something that was shared with me that shed some new light on my path.

Remember

“We will always remember. We will always be proud.

We will always be prepared, so we will always be free.” 

Ronald Regan

Let us not ever forget the sacrifices that have been made, and are yet to be made by those who so bravely serve in our military, to make America such a great nation.

....Another Butterfly Day

Last Sunday I took my camera to my parent's house and went for a walk around their property, capturing some of the beautiful images that can be found within their 2 acres (where I grew up). I was lucky to get to add to my butterfly photo collection with a couple shots...

“I tell of hearts and souls and dances...
Butterflies and second chances;
Desperate ones and dreamers bound,
Seeking life from barren ground,
Who suffer on in earthly fate
The bitter pain of agony hate,
Might but they stop and here forgive
Would break the bonds to breathe and live
And find that God in goodness brings
A chance for change, the hope of wings
To rest in Him, and self to die
And so become a butterfly.”

Karen Kingsbury

(from Ocean's Apart)

Food, Faith & (in)Fertility......and Friday!

It's been a busy week with lots going on, but I did come across some things for this weeks installment ;-)

{food}


 photo from kraftfoods.com

I have been making this pie for a long time now and took it to our family BBQ at my parent's house Sunday:

Key Lime Margarita Pie (for the crust....up the pretzels to 1 3/4 cup, only add 1T of sugar, up butter/marg. to 8T). You will want to cut small slices of both this and also the following pie.

And....


I also made this recipe into a "Peanut Butter Cup Pie" by just tweaking it slightly:

Ingredients:
(2) 3.4 oz. packages of Vanilla Pudding & Pie Filling Mix
2 1/2 C Milk (I used 2%)
1/2 C Lite Whipped Topping
~1 C Natural Peanut Butter- Smooth (Natural is also better for this because it isn't very sweet.)
1 Pre-made Chocolate Cookie (or Graham) Crust
12 mini-Reece's Peanut Butter Cups

Directions:
1. Mix together both boxes of Vanilla Pudding Mix and Milk with an electric mixer on low, then med. speed. It will turn pretty thick. At this point you can stop mixing.
2. Add Peanut Butter and mix until smooth.
3. Add Whipped Topping and mix for approximately 1-2 minutes.
4. Gently stir in 9 of the PB cups (after you cut them in 4).
5. Pour filling into the crust.
6. Cover with lid and place pie in the freezer for a few hours. (It probably wouldn't even need to be in there an hour.) You could also set it the fridge if you didn't want it to be as hard. When it is time to serve, let it sit out for 10 minutes before cutting.



{faith}

I am so thankful for this verse this week:

"Do not gloat over me, my enemies! For though I fall, I will rise again.

Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light."

Micah 7:8

{(in)fertility}

This is a short and sweet post, from a great blog. A list of things that we need from others, as well as need to be for others, during the tough times of life:

What We Need to Help Us Through Trials (click on title for article)


Happy Friday!

With Love on Mother's Day

"To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the LORD has planted for his own glory."

Isaiah 61:3

Food, Faith & (in)Fertility....and Friday

TGIF! I am back to working full-time again after being part-time with some full-time weeks mixed in over the past few years. I am working for a "temp" agency or "employment" agency, and still under contract at the same place I've been for almost a year! I guess they keep people for years under contract before hiring them permanently. But I feel like I've started a new job because I am learning a ton more stuff, getting a little overwhelmed, and definitely tired out. So, definitely thankful for the weekend!

As for this weeks installment of my new Friday series:

{food}

I made this for a church potluck on Sunday and really liked it. Also super easy:
Beef and Black Bean Taco Bake (I used 8-Whole Wheat Tortillas, 16 oz. jar of reg. Medium Salsa, & added approx. 3/4 c. of reduced fat Sour Cream because it needed more "liquid"). Super yummy and easy!

Made for Girl's Nite:
Homemade Guacamole
(no link since it was a recipe I got a looong time ago from someone)

3-4 ripe avocados chopped (ripe avocados give a little when you press against them).
2-3 small diced fresh tomatoes
3 cloves minced garlic
1 small diced red onion
1 handful of freshly chopped cilantro
2-3 diced jalapenos (depending on how spicy you like it)
2 T Sour cream (optional, it makes it more creamy)...I just did this for the 1st time and loved it.1 lime (squeezed for juice)...I used lime juice in a bottle and just add and taste until it's good :)1 T Salt...I don't add this much.
Mix together (you can "smash" it or just gently mix- whatever your preference). Refrigerate. If making ahead, put plastic wrap over the guacamole (press it down until it touches the guac.), if not it will turn brown.

{faith}

I have had this desktop wallpaper on my computer at work this week. It is one of my favorite verses and very fitting for Mother's Day weekend:

You can click on the picture to go to the source and choose what size fits your screen.

{(in)Fertility}

I read this post this week, and wow. I have been following this blog for some time, and really enjoy reading her posts and her perspective (as a fellow IF'er) on a variety of topics. This post is another one for both the Infertile and those who love us. I don't know if I have ever heard the feeling of what it's like to have an empty womb, and empty arms, put so perfectly.

The Parable of the Silver Locket {A Mother's Day Post}


Happy Friday :)

Girl's Nite

We try for one Saturday a month. The girls on my mom's side of the family (my aunts, cousins, and sister, sometimes grandma) meet at someones house and have fun eating good food, watching a movie, and laughing. A lot. I am so thankful for my aunt suggesting that we start this tradition a few years ago. With the busyness of life, it is nice to slow down and gather together around a table for a meal. And did I mention laughter?!

Here are a few pictures:

my homemade guacamole

 our dinner spread

 my sister's awesome cake balls

all of us girls :)  (me on the far right)

P.S. I have added more to my Joy Journal.

Food, Faith & (in)Fertility.....and Friday

photo courtesy of Chris Campbell

 

I am going to start a new series on Fridays (as best I can) to post some things I have found or learned throughout the week related to the title of my blog. I hope you like it.


{Food}

Even someone who likes to cook gets bored in the kitchen once in a while (at least I do!). So in an effort to start incorporating some of the meat in our freezer already with only having to buy a little extra, I dug around for some new recipes and new ways to cook things. So far we have tried a few of the things and they were really yummy (and easy, healthy, not too time consuming, and budget friendly!) with enough for leftovers:

Orange-Chicken Rice Bowl (added extra juice and dressing)
Spaghetti Pie
Asian Skillet Supper (I quadrupled it since it is a single serving recipe)

For the sweet tooth (and BBQ at work last week):

Chocolate Cookie Pudding (omitted the nuts and added some gummy worms to the top)

{Faith}

While at work today a thought popped into my head about waiting. It was the famous quote, "Good things come to those who wait." Immediately the thought got turned around and it was a light bulb moment: 
Good things come through the waiting.

Just wanted to share.


{(in)Fertility}

I read this piece, "The New 'It Girls'....Give it Up for Non-Moms," the other day and it was really worth the read. I could relate to so many things...Even if you are not Infertile, it will help you understand the feelings of one who is. It is an interview between the blog author and a woman who did a study on women living without children after Infertility and the recovery from this traumatic loss. There is a link in this article for a 200 page dissertation which I downloaded but have not read yet, but this article gives some very good insight.


Happy Friday :)

Butterfly Days

I love butterflies. To me they symbolize so many things.

Second chances.
New life.
Hope.

They are such beautiful creatures with intricate designs. God's handiwork.

Given that I love butterflies so much, when I read Karen Kinsbury's book "Oceans Apart"  a while back, I fell in love with the scene in the book where a little boy names Max is sitting with his (unknown to him at the time) father, and they are fishing. Max has lost his mother in a tragic accident and is coming to terms with his loss as best a young child can when faced with such tragedy. A butterfly lands on his fishing pole and he shares with Mr. Evans (his father) the special meaning that butterflies had to him and his mom. They would often have "butterfly days" where he and his mom would sit and watch butterflies:

"She said that they prove that God gives second chances"

"Butterflies prove that?"

"Yeah, because a butterfly spends all those days as a callipillar, scooting on the ground. Did you know that?"

"I did." Mr. Evans eyes were serious. Max figured it was because he liked this story.

"Then one day"- Max stared at the butterfly- "one day he gets tired of scooting around, so he builds a little room and takes a nap there." Max made his voice quiet again because sometimes it would get loud when he told a good story. And the story of his special butterfly days was a very good one. "But know what the bestest part is, Mr. Evans?"

"What?" His face was closer now, because they both had shushed their words so the butterfly wouldn't leave.

"One day the callipillar wakes up and God has done an amazing thing. The callipillar shakes his shoulders a little, and what do you know? There's something on his back!" Max shook his back a very little to show Mr. Evans what he meant. The butterfly gave a big flap of his wings, but still he stayed on the fishing pole. "That thing is wings, Mr. Evans. And now the callipillar doesn't have to scoot around on the ground because-"

"Because he can fly." A smile came on Mr. Evans face. "And that's his second chance, right?"

"Yes." He blinked so he could see the butterfly better. "She said that one day soon we'd be together again and we'd never scoot around on the ground. Instead we would fly. Forever and ever we would fly."

I have had a couple "butterfly days" this week (my Joy Journal updated....check!). A flowering Crabapple tree at my work is home to a host of Red Admirals (and Bumble Bees!) right now, and I have seen many around our yard as well (but those ones seem to be faster fliers so no pics yet!). I also saw a Swallowtail butterfly on our house today, but that too alluded me just as I was about to snap a picture!! It was a beautiful day though as I just watched the butterflies and birds and thought how awesome is God to create such living things for our enjoyment!

I also read today that a warm winter like we had means more butterflies. Finally a silver-lining to not getting any snow (barely)!